A Merchant’s Quarrel: A Chromaicora Adventures Holiday Special - By GeekyGamerZack

The annual Merchant’s Festival has once again come to Junihoshi, and right across the globe people are getting ready to celebrate in true koble fashion. The Crystalbound are having fun preparing for their festivities in Silvertooth, but Brocc is repeatedly disruptive, and tries to encourage the others to sing “carols”, drink “nog” and exchange “gifts”. The night before the Merchant’s Festival, Brocc is visited by a mysterious “being from beyond the Twelve Stars” who tells him that a troupe of mysterious “hosts” are going to spend the night teaching him all about the Merchant’s Festival, but in typical Brocc fashion, their task proves to be far from easy! Will Brocc learn to treat the Merchant’s Festival properly, or will he be forever stuck in a cross-multiversal limbo of ignorance?

Scene 1: Tad and Siren’s Apartment: Mundane Realm: Terra: Morning

The scene fades in to a view of a Christmas tree covered with decorations, from baubles and tiny ribbon-wrapped presents to ornaments of white kangaroos with Santa hats. A pair of hands pops a shiny, red bauble onto a branch, and the scene zooms out to reveal those hands belonging to Siren. She turns her head away from the tree and calls out.

Siren: Boys! Are you gonna decorate this thing or what?

Tad’s voice: Coming!

Tad and Zed walk into view. Zed is wearing reindeer antlers, whereas Tad is wearing an elf hat and ears.

Siren: Where were you?

Tad: Sorry, just had to take a quick trip to the fantastic realm.

Siren: You were gone an hour!

Tad: Yeah, sorry about that...

Zed: Tad wanted to show me a new market stall in Umbel Plaza.

Siren: Really?

Tad: Yeah! I saw this really pretty, sparkly fish pendant there, and I wanted to get it for you for Christmas.

Siren: Oh, Tad...

Tad: But then I remembered that I can’t bring things from the fantastic to the mundane.

Siren sighs.

Siren: Of course...

Zed: And I don’t know how to use a transport beacon to shift between realms, so...

Siren: Say no more. Besides, it’s the thought that counts, right?

Siren smiles.

Siren: Anyway, it’s Zander’s first Christmas, right?

Tad: TECHNICALLY it’s his thirty-

Siren: I’m not counting the years he lost when he...well, you know...

Tad: Oh, right...

Siren: Besides, we don’t even know if he’s a native of this universe, do we?

Zed: Well, technically I am from here. I was raised here after all, right?

Tad: So Erik claims, Zander.

Siren: Anyway, I want to make this Christmas extra-special for you.

Zander: Aw, thanks...

Tad: She’s only saying that ‘cause she hates celebrating Christmas in summer.

Siren: Tad, shut up!

Tad: She’s always wanted to spend Christmastime somewhere up north. Snow...sleigh rides...roasted chestnuts...

Siren: So? What’s wrong with a few prawns and a trip to the beach?

Tad: Siren, we go to the beach almost all the time. We should do something special these holidays!

Siren: Ah, I see what’s going on...

Zed: What?

Siren: Our boy Tad here is the one who wants a white Christmas!

Tad: Uh...n-no I don’t...

Siren: Oh, please! You’ve been dropping hints all November. “Hey Siren, let’s go to Scotland!” “Yo Siren, I heard you like Canada!” “Siren, wanna see the northern parts of Ryokoro?”

Zed: Ryokoro?

Tad: Japan! I meant Japan!

Siren: Like fun you did! You want to go somewhere wintry for Christmas, and it appears you’ll do whatever it takes to achieve that goal, even if it means piggy-backing on Zander’s travel power to see a world that Erik explicitly told us not to visit without his supervision!

Tad: Well...how come Zander gets to live in Junihoshi and we don’t?

Zed: Uh-

Siren: Tad, Zander is an Icon. He’s allowed to travel anywhere he wants to go.

Zed: Actually-

Tad: Well, I’d settle for Scotland. Or Canada. Or indeed Japan.

Siren: Well, Belle’s already invited us to see her drama club’s performance of A Christmas Carol, so we’re going nowhere.

Tad: Aw...

Zed: For what it’s worth, they don’t even have Christmas in Junihoshi.

Tad: Seriously?!

Zed: Well, they have the Merchant’s Festival instead, which I think is kind of similar.

Tad: How so?

Zed: Well...

Scene 2: The Naked Drake Tavern: Silvertooth: Silveria: Junihoshi: Evening

Amethyst, Mak, Emily, Thobrun, Bryn, Kendall and Tamamaki sit at a table with a number of drinks strewn across it.

Mak: Well, the Merchant’s Festival starts tomorrow. I can’t wait!

Mak giggles.

Thobrun: You seem unusually giddy, Mak.

Mak: Well, I’ve always loved this time of year! My friends Guy and Knight always used to celebrate it with me. Knight was always the one who knew the best places to go during the festival, which I figure is a no-brainer since it IS a koble holiday.

Bryn: Well, I’m just looking forward to us planning tomorrow’s festivities...that is, when Brocc bothers to turn up.

Brocc’s voice: Hey, everyone!

Brocc is suddenly standing at the table wearing a Santa hat.

Bryn: WAAH!

Brocc: Merry Merchant’s Day, everyone!


Bryn: BROCC! What are you doing?!

Brocc: Why, singing some traditional Merchant’s Day carols, of course!

Emily: “Carols”...?

Brocc: Yeah! Let’s sing an old classic!


Kendall: “Partridge”...?

Tamamaki: “Pear”...?


Emily: How can doves be turtles?

Amethyst: I cannot even begin to fathom-


Bryn: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Bad singing aside, you do realise that there are only TWO days of the Merchant’s Festival, right?

Brocc: Maybe...

Bryn: Well, how many days were you gonna sing about?

Brocc: Why, twelve, of course!

Bryn: TWELVE?! You were gonna sing about over half a decade’s worth of Merchant’s Festivals?!

Brocc: Well, yeah...

Bryn: Unbelievable...

Brocc: Oh yeah! I brought you gifts!

Mak: What’s a “gifts”...?

Brocc: Well, a present!

Mak: Well, why not just say “present”, then?

Brocc: No idea. Anyway, here!

Brocc tosses bottles of opaque pale yellow liquid to each party member.

Tamamaki: You bring us potions, Broccoli-senpai?

Brocc: Nope, BETTER than potions! Although I DID brew these myself. Go ahead, try it!

The others unseal their bottles and try the liquid inside.

Emily: This is wonderful!

Amethyst: Most pleasant indeed.

Tamamaki: Oishii desu ka? (Isn’t it delicious?)

Bryn: What do you call it?

Bryn begins guzzling hers.

Brocc: Eggnog.

Bryn turns her head and spits out the liquid.

Bryn: BROCC! You know full well that I HATE egg!

Brocc scratches his head.

Brocc: Oh yeah...

Bryn: And I don’t know what “nog” is, but I’m sure I hate IT as well!

Mak: Well, I think this is delicious.

Kendall: Hear, hear!

Bryn: That is IT! Brocc just does NOT get the Merchant’s Festival! So help me...

Mak: So help you what, Bryn?

Bryn: I’ll...I’ll...FORCE him to learn about the Merchant’s Festival, just you wait!

Bryn leaps from her seat and walks away.

Brocc: But...we didn’t even do our Secret Merchant yet...

Scene 3: Zed’s House: Silvertooth: Silveria: Junihoshi: Late Night

Brocc sleeps in Zed’s bed. He is sleep-talking.

Brocc: No...Sven, that’s MY turkey leg...get your own...

The groan of a creaky door echoes throughout Zed’s bedroom. Brocc suddenly awakens and sits up.

Brocc: Who’s there?!

Zed’s voice: Broccoli Pharrschott...

Brocc: Who is that?!

Zed’s voice: I am a being from beyond the Twelve Stars...and I bring you a message...

Light suddenly illuminates parts of a Zed-like face from below.

Brocc: AAAAAAAAHH!

“Zed”: Oh, sorry, Brocc!

A clicking sound is heard, and the face disappears into the darkness. After a moment, an orb of light appears in front of Zed, who has his hands around it. Brocc breathes a sigh of relief.

Brocc: Oh, it’s only you, Zander...

Zed: Yep!

Brocc: So?

Zed: So...what?

Brocc: What’s the message?

Zed: Oh yeah. You will be visited by seven Hosts during the night.

Brocc: Wait a minute...this seems suspiciously like-

Zed: Oh...you’ve read it?

Brocc: Zander, I’m a well-travelled, well-versed gnome. Come on.

Zed: Oh...good point.

Brocc: And don’t you mean “three spirits”? The Ghosts of Merchant’s Past, etcetera...

Zed: Well, no. And it was mostly Bryn’s idea anyway.

Brocc: Oh. But...you were in Terra. How did you get Bryn’s memo?

Zed: Oh, uh...Erik relayed it to me.

Brocc: Of course he did.

Zed: Anyway, these seven Hosts-

Brocc: Wait...shouldn’t there be eight Hosts, one for each Crystalbound?

Zed: Well, yeah, but one of the Crystalbound is away until after New Year.

Brocc: Fair enough. So when will I see the first Host?

Zed: Soon. But...I have to leave for now.

Brocc: Already?!

Zed: Well, yeah. I have to get back to Tad and Siren’s for our Secret Santa exchange. I’m Tad’s Secret Santa!

Brocc: Ooh, what did you get him?

Zed: Well, it’s-

Bryn’s voice: Zed! Get on with it!

Zed: Right, sorry. Uh...I better go.

Brocc: Fair enough.

The mark starts glowing on the back of Zed’s hand with cyan light, followed by the same pattern appearing beneath his feet with metallic cyan light.

Zed: Happy Merchant’s Festival!

A column of metallic-cyan-tinged light erupts from the ground around Zed. After a moment, it retreats into the ground, and the pattern disappears. Zed is nowhere to be found.

Brocc: Wow, that was so intense. Adrenaline is pumping through my body! No WAY I’ll be able to go back to-

Brocc suddenly falls asleep, snoring loudly.